Growing up becomes more challenging as you get older.... your body feels more tired easily, your memory starts to decrease and you become more comfortable with staying at home as opposed to going out; having ADD, I realize, makes things more difficult sometimes. Of course, there may also be times where you have more energy to do all sorts of fun and creative things; you'll want to spend time with friends or even enjoy your solitude. Being an adult is hard, but I know there's still some youthful energy inside of you. Try your best to hold onto that.
You've learned a lot. Always try your best to respect your own growth journey. Try to be more present and enjoy the little things, even if other people aren't bothering to notice that themselves. Learn to exercise more care, compassion and balance with yourself and how you navigate the world; you know that God's got your back no matter what. You have such a strong support system behind you as well; don't forget to extend appreciation for them as much as you can. Society may seem harsh or unforgiving at times... There may be moments where it feels like you're being forced to take on more responsibility. It's okay to speak up for yourself and put yourself first. It's honestly quite necessary for you to do that. Your needs matter. How you feel matters; stop allowing other people to convince you otherwise. You're allowed to take up space, and you don't always have to become a doormat for other people to step on or take advantage of.
I'm proud of you for working on yourself as much as you did. I know it hasn't been easy. I know that having ADD and a learning disability makes things harder sometimes, but the knowledge you've gained through therapy/counseling and other places as well is paying off greatly. I know there have been times where it didn't feel that way and things felt lackluster. I know that you've gone through phases of not caring at all about God's impact on your life. I know you've given yourself headaches, trying to figure out your own sense of worth and purpose from a more "self-centered" perspective. You think too much, but this isn't always a bad thing. You just need to learn how to balance that out with allowing yourself to rest and be in the present moment. You know exactly how to help yourself, and this is the biggest asset you have for setting better habits. It's definitely okay to be proud of yourself for taking the initiative on so many things related to growth and learning. This is the kind of attitude that can help get you far in your own goals in life. You'll figure out what those are at your own pace.
SPEAKING TO YOU AT AGE 25/26
Even though you've gone through a lot of change and growth, I think it's time you recognize that you don't have to do it all alone. I'm saying this, and yet, I know that I struggle with being too independently-minded still on occasion. Your pride may get bruised or beaten down, but it's better to let people help you when you need it. It's okay if that makes you feel uncomfortable sometimes. Just know that you'd be surprised what might happen the more you open up to others. You've gotten a bit too comfortable with isolation at times, and this hasn't exactly helped you with your mental and emotional health on more than one occasion, so try your best to prioritize self-care and improving or challenging your thoughts.
Everybody grows at their own pace. Everybody has their own struggles in their own life. Your anger, sadness and frustration blindsides you; it distracts you from seeing the bigger picture of what God has in store for you. At 31 years old now, I realize that this is the reason why you thought it would be easier to just find yourself through other people at times, but doing things that way doesn't always yield better results. If anything, it's made you a little more confused and misguided. You've tried your best. You showed up for yourself and for God at just the right time, even if the things you've been through were difficult and challenging. Go easy on yourself. I'm proud of you. I know that God is proud and loves you as well (as well as Mom and Dad), and it's okay if you can't fathom that at times or feel undeserving of it. That just makes you human.
No comments:
Post a Comment