For roughly 2 1/2 years I've doubted God's existence. I can't say that I firmly believe in God or any other higher power in this universe because doing so only threatens my put my mental stability out of balance. The last time I tried convincing myself otherwise, my head felt like it was coming in close contact with a needle.
So with that being said, you can see why I'm not religious or spiritual period. I'm just me and my morals are my own. What I do with my life at this point onward is a choice I make for myself. People can say what they want or tell me that I'm living a lie, but I won't care. I just want to live for myself alone and have that be that.
Atheism means something different to everyone and people have their own reasons for choosing to live that way. And while my general views on Christianity are starting to change some, I'm still trying my best to be appreciative, understanding and respectful. We just have to do what works best for us in life. You see, I used to be judgmental and hypocritical when I was in that Christian mindset, and it wasn't until a year or so ago that I started to see how that reflected my character and how I see other people.
I firmly believe that our actions and words need to align up with each other as much as possible. We may be human, but all it takes to better yourself is switching your attitude and learning to treat people with kindness and respect. Since doing this, I've come to feel more like myself than I have 2 or 3 years ago. My life hasn't been easy and while I do realize that people are still capable of casting judgment regardless of being religious or not, at least I can say that I feel more comfortable in my own skin these days.
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